….actually I’ve had a few. My husband was away in Nashville connecting with a team of youth pastors from across the country to start planning International Youth Convention 2014. I, of course, am crazy proud of him and excited for this new opportunity, but was also sad to see him go. I get very, very, VERY nervous without my husband here. The anxiety takes me back to my days of postpartum depression/anxiety, when I cried every time he left the house. “What am I going to do with this baby,” I used to wonder and fret. Now my worry turned to “What am I going to do with this preschooler?” and “How am I going to get to work and get him from church before I start feeling guilt over being a working mom?” So my life situation has changed since those early days of Zoloft. I made an executive decision to use almost all of the time off I had “banked,” and not have to worry about getting stuck by an emergency at work and being late to pick up said preschooler. AND I took some ever-important “me” time. Each day I found that I planned more than I should have and by the time I picked Zeke up, I was pretty tired, but felt productive. I was able to share some quality time with my son, which is worth so much more to me than all the banked time-off in the world. Keeping him in somewhat of a “normal” routine was great. I am blessed to have a great preschool that I trust to love him and care for him while I do whatever it is I need to do. Of course, at the end of the trip, I discovered that there was nothing to fear or be anxious about…I’ve got this. And plus, I paddle-boarded with dolphins. If that doesn’t give you inner peace, you need medication for realz.
When Josh got home, he was tired, but at the same time renewed in his mission and vision for ministry AND our family. When we had a big sit-down talk about his trip and all he had learned, he did use the word “intentional,” but I decided to forgive him
Today is his birthday, also Martin Luther King Jr. day, so all three of us are off. And I took an extra day tomorrow just to spend with him.
It’s been a great week!